Tuesday, February 15, 2011

Hold em or Fold em!

Think of a poker hand, not something awesome like aces or kings, but a good hand, not your lucky hand, but a good hand and not a pocket pair, keep that in your head and read on.
Check. Call. Raise. ALL IN! Some people gamble, some have skill, but what if you could know each and every time what the other person is holding? You would never ever lose, unless of course you are the unluckiest person on the planet. There are times while playing when you have a rough idea whether the person is bluffing or actually has a hand, but it's really hard to guess exactly. Yet somehow is it possible to tell what exactly the person has?
Well there are a few things that I have learnt and observed that have helped me to figure out what the other person might have, and it is usually right. Some things that I have noticed and help me are :
1) Chest out, shoulders raised, upright posture - Awesome cards, do yourself a favor, save your money and throw your cards in the muck before you're on the road dancing around hoping to get money.
2) Uneasiness - Look at the person, not the flop. The flop will be there later, his first expression won't be. Any uneasiness in the person or any unnatural movements will mean he has good cards or hit something.
3) Unusual breathing - One word.. bluff! If you see a person breathing to fast, call him or raise him and win the big bucks even if you have cards that won't even help in winning you a recharge.
4) Swallow : Nervousness leads to people swallowing their own spit, and nervousness happens when they are bluffing, stare at the person's Adam's apple to see if he swallows, if he does, it's a bluff!
5) Left eye flickering: If you ever see a person's eye flickering for no apparent reason, throw your cards away, instantly! Because that person is holding a monster!
The sixth and the most important rule is, don't play poker with me, you might as well tear your cards and throw them in the dustbin or be robbed by a nineteen year old "mind reader." Also this rule applies because this nineteen year old mind reader, a.k.a me, doesn't want to get addicted to poker again, or else he'll end up doing tricks based on poker on his shows to get weird looks from people who have no idea how the game is played and can't quite understand why the kid in front of them is talking in gibberish.
Oh one more thing, how many of you forgot about the fact that you were supposed to have a poker hand in you head as you read the post? Now that you remembered, how many of you were thinking of ace king or ace queen?
Enough of poker, the mind control device is ready, I must go test it on my tiny little goldfish and see if it's appropriate to use on humans too. (For those of you who din't get it, that was a terrible attempt at a joke, there is no such thing as a mind control device and obviously I don't own a goldfish)!
Thank you for reading though, I hope all your pots are monsters and all your cards aces.